Why are so many men out there not able to commit? They have all the right qualifications, but they don’t want to settle down and at least be in a committed relationship. I’m not asking for them to MARRY me, just be my boyfriend.
OK ladies, I’m going to be sexist here so bare with me. Imagine there is a chocolate out there that actually BURNS calories and gives you endorphin and orgasms. You’d go to work to support your cocaine like addiction to this chocolate right? right.
Just like chocolate, guys are addicted to sex. We can’t help it, we are wired to think about sex. There, I just thought about sex. Snopes debunked the idea that men think about sex every seven seconds. They still found that men think about sex TWICE as much as women. Thought about it again. So, it is safe to assume, if someone were addicted to something they would spend most of their time trying to figure out how to get it or support their addiction right? right.
Yes, your local neighborhood bar. There is a reason why bars are a 100 BILLION dollar industry. They are the perfect business model. They provide two products to men, a variety of women to choose from at varying stages of sobriety to give any man a chance. The bars also offer a service to women, the idea that it is a ‘great place to meet guys.’ Most women really want to connect with a man on an emotional level and most really men want to connect sex organs.
It takes around 6 months of talking about your cat’s dietary needs and listening to him talk about his fantasy football team to connect on an emotional level. Given that it is common knowledge that women will have sex within the first three to four dates, that 12% of women between the ages of 21-24 will have sex on the first night and 34% of women over 30 will have sex on the first night — we know who is going to get theirs first (you would expect nothing less huh?).
Let’s do some math. Say I go to a bar, and a hit on three women over thirty. I buy each of them two drinks and tell them my life story, that I’m a writer, I was in the Army Infantry, I love dogs, I work out and I have a decent job. My chances of getting laid are roughly around 102%. At seven dollars a drink, that puts me at around $42. That’s at a going rate of around $00.40 per percentage rate. A mid-level semi-attractive prostitute goes for around $350 for full service. That’s at a going rate of $3.50 per percentage rate and A ‘High Class’ prostitute is $2000/hr with a percentage rate at $20.
In other words if I wanted to have sex every night with a prostitute for a year it would cost me $127,750, that’s around four times the average income per year. If I wanted to go to a bar every night and have sex with a different woman it would cost me $15,330, just under half the average income per year. Given that a heroin addict spends around $150 to $200 each day to stay high, I’d say that’s pretty good.
So, let’s play a little game and see where we land. We are going to see where your gamble for emotional connection lands you on the Whore-o-meter. (This only applies to women that are looking for emotional connection, if you are of the rare breed that you are attractive, in good shape and only want sex — stop reading this now and email me your phone number)
The point of all this, is that the system is broken in our favor — for now — and we intend to take full advantage of it. Ladies if you want a man to commit you have to string him along and not show him ALL your tricks until you’re married, then you can dump them out on the table and then get fat and there’s not a god damn thing he can do about it then.